MINDFLEX Sucks, Don't Fall for It

Allow me to take this short minute to bitch. I recently was told to watch a commercial concerning a toy that, well, is going to fucking suck. It's apparently been around for almost a year, but I can see them getting ready to pounce on the public with this trash for Christmas. DON'T FALL FOR THIS SHIT:

Really, do you think we're going to go for this? I don't even have to purchase this dreck to know it's ineffective. Mindflex is being touted as the "next big thing", and it's only one big thing and that's a big pile of shit. The picture here shows you the basic idea. By using "mind control", you can move a ball through a variety of obstacles like tubes, hoops, and so forth. By concentrating, you move the ball, or so they say. Check out a video on the official site by clicking here

If you watch, you'll notice they're quite slippery about how they approach the advertisement. First you're given popping text that suggests you're going to be "using your mind" to operate the device. KEWL. Then you'll see all this shit about how you're going to be AMAZED (text twitching) with people looking absolutely psyched to use it. But wait a minute, hmmm, what the fuck are their hands doing? Look closely around 42 seconds in that video. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Really, come on you assholes! The only flexing going on here is with your fingers. Granted, the machine actually is reading your concentration according to what I've read, but THAT'S FUCKING IT. In fact, several reviews online are suggesting this thing is just measuring contractions on your forehead or something just as stupid. By "concentrating", you can cause the ball to rise or fall, but that's all you're capable of doing. To get it to move throughout the course, you turn a small nob on the front that causes the FUCKING AIR VENTS under the ball to rotate so the ball "moves" around the various obstacles. What a fucking joke, and apparently people have been complaining it comes with no instructions and requires fucking C batteries to work. The bulk of the video revolves around "testimonials" of people using it and saying how awesome it is, but about 3/4 through you'll witness the actual explanation of how it works for a very abrupt moment. This is a joke, DON'T FALL FOR IT. Don't give them money! MAKE SURE MIND FLEX FAILS THIS CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!

Gimmicks like this are a dime a dozen, but this one is a bit disengenuous. No, that's being nice, it's a plain fucking rip off. The TV commercial is even worse because it barely explains the actual function, so it's clear they're banking on kids being like GIVE ME BUY GIVE BUY ME GIVE, and parents responding YES WILL BUY CHRISTMAS BUY COOL SOUNDS BUY. It sucks, don't give it a second, and save your kids from it before they learn too soon how disappointing life is. Watch the video and get a clue, Atari was thinking about doing something similar years ago but gave up the venture for a reason. Don't believe me? Read about it all by clicking here. Do yourself and everyone else a favor, spread the hate.