I Dream of OLIVER STONE

I rarely remember my dreams but I had a strange one last night. I was at a fancy apartment in a high rise building. The apartment belonged to a friend of mine who in real life  is a broke ass and who in my dream was wearing an expensive suit and was smoking a dick-shaped cigar . There was a fancy party going on and there was barely anybody there. Lots of waiters though.

I had it going. I was drinking whiskey and feeling groovy when I saw Oliver Stone walk in. He had a stunning lady hanging on his arm. I approached him and told him that I loved his movies.

‘Which one?’ , he quickly replied.

‘Platoon’, I said. ‘Fantastic stuff’.

He didn’t look back at me and scanned the party while his head started bouncing to the rhythm of Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get Your Out of My Head” which was blaring out of the speakers.

‘What else?’, he then asked.

‘Any Given Sunday’, I replied. ‘Fantastic stuff’. 

Actually, I hate that movie not because it’s bad but because I hate football. It’s a boring sport for fat people. Not that there is anything wrong with fat people. I have actually put on a couple of pounds over the last few years. Anyway, I could not remember any other Oliver Stone movies so I just said Any Given Sunday.

Then, I took a chug of my drink, which for some reason was served in a metallic cup. As I was drinking I noticed something moving in my glass and tickling my face.  A few repulsive ideas crossed my mind and I instinctively threw my glass to the floor and accidentally spat the alcohol all over Stone’s chest. He didn't seem to mind. Then, out of my glass came a strange creature. I would call it a shrider, because it looked like a cross between a shrimp and a spider.  It then started walking in circles and everyone in the party was repulsed. Including Mr. Stone who then looked at me and said,

‘Dude, you are gross’.

OBUS - The Grim Reaper is Going to Stop By

Don't blame these muchachos for doing playback. That's how the game was played in Spain in the 80's.

Not many people knew Obus in my native South America but one day, when I was around twelve years old, this dude with a giant head that used to go to school with me gave me a tape of Obus. I think he had stolen it from a friend of his and since I was the only guy he knew that liked metal he gave it to me. 

The name of the album was called Pega Con Fuerza, which translates to Strike Hard, and after I gave it a listen at home, I hit play, again and again and again.... 

I was hooked. My mother hated it because my favorite song was called "Te Visitara La Muerte" which translates to Death Will Visit You or The Grim Reaper is Going to Stop By, or something along those lines and I guess that kinda fucked with her Catholic beliefs. I was young and she was already started to worrying about my soul. I love my mother, almost as much as I love this song.

Pay attention to the beginning and notice how someone in the audience throws his jacket up in the air. Also, pay close attention to the bass. I think it used to belong to Gene Simmons. One more thing, the video and the music don't sync up.

To: DEAF SPARROW Zine - From: DOLPH LUNDGREN Fan Club

Last week I received an envelope with two records from a French label. When I looked at the envelope something caught my attention, the sender's address is listed as Dolph Lundgren Fan Club. Immediately, images of crew cut blond boys in corpsepaint started flashing in front of my eyes.

French black metal guys are known for their stern minds and lack of humor. If this pisses them off I hope they don't feel like they must break me. After all, I come in peace.

EARTH Reveals Details About New Album

EARTH have completed  their highly anticipated upcoming full-length album, which has been a subject of  much discussion over the past two years. Following the band's magnificent  2008-released The Bees Made Honey In  The Lion's Skull opus, the next chapter  in the ongoing EARTH legacy is ready for public consumption. To see release via  Southern Lord Recordings in February 2011, the recently completed new album has  been titled Angels Of Darkness, Demons Of Light 1, and promises to be a  brand new entity within EARTH's already impressive and constantly progressing  lineage.

Joining founding  guitarist and band frontman Dylan Carlson and percussionist Adrienne Davies, the  album lineup this time around also includes cellist Lori Goldston (Nirvana,  David Byrne, Black Cat Orchestra, Laura Veirs) and Karl Blau (K Records, Laura  Veirs, Microphones) on electric bass.

Returning to Seattle's Avast Studios in April and July of 2010 to again work with producer  Stuart Hallerman (Soundgarden, Mudhoney, Built To Spill, and Earth2), EARTH's newest  masterpiece shows the band continuing to expand on the Americana  themes represented on The  Bees Made Honey In The Lion's Skull, and even their incredible 2005 album Hex  (Or Printing The Infernal Method), taking their sound into broad new  directions.

Citing inspiration from  British folk-rock bands the Pentangle and Fairport Convention, as well as North  African Tuareg band Tinariwen this time around, while still maintaining the  thunderous, organic heaviness of previous EARTH releases, the material on Angels Of Darkness, Demons Of Light 1 is  more fluid and melodically oriented in nature, relying on more textured patterns and a greater emphasis on improvisational songwriting tactics. This, as well  as the inclusion of cello and other experimentations from the musicians involved, culminate into some unforgettable new hymns.

The album was mastered by Mell Dettmer, who also remastered the recent re-release of EARTH's first recordings in the form of A  Bureaucratic Desire For Extra Capsular Extraction, released by Southern Lord  in late October.

Angels Of Darkness,  Demons Of Light 1
Track  Listing:
1. Old  Black
2. Father  Midnight
3. Descent To The  Zenith
4. Hella's  Winter
5. Angels Of  Darkness, Demons Of Light 1

I WAS DORA SUAREZ Scared the Shit Out of Me

Death metal bands obsessed with all sorts of graphic brutality and yummy yummy coprophagia, shall start reading some of the books written by English author Derek Raymond. Maybe then, some eloquent germ will infest them and cause them to stop writing lyrics that come off like third rate Cannibal Corpse shit.

I recently started reading I Was Dora Suarez, Raymond’s fourth book in his Factory series, and was instantly taken aback by its explicit nature.  Raymond (whose real name was Robin Cook) slashes our gag reflex within the first few pages. The author goes to incredibly gruesome lengths by detailing the act of killing (and then shitting and masturbating with a bloody dick on top of the corpse) to such a detailed extent, even I –whom I consider to be an individual with a strong stomach-had to stop every few sentences just to catch my breath. And I am only about ten pages into the book. It is that fucking sick! Seriously, this guy makes Dennis Cooper look like Danielle Steel.

As a matter of fact, I Was Dora Suarez is such a morbid book I kind of feel bad just having it in my house. As I read it last night I thought of my three year old daughter and the idea that one day she will find it in my library and think that I am a fucking pervert really disturbed me. The only other book that has made me think this way was the anthology of the Answer Me! fanzine, which was so rampacked with hilarious shit that is wrong at so many levels I started feeling like a pervert.

Musically speaking there are only a couple of records that have made me feel this way. The first one being  Matando Gueros by Brujeria.  The cover is a real image and hence more gruesome than any graphic drawing, but that was not it, it was the lyrics which were in Spanish and hence, screamed in my ear in my native language, caused in me pure repulsion. Also, the vocals of Juan Brujo were not that distorted, they were rough and gruff, but you could easily understand all that’s being screamed. Which is not the same in English, a language that back then I could not understand in its musical context at all and hence, lyrically speaking, could not affect me.

I was already a metal fan, by then. And I never had a problem with the Carcass sleeves but Brujeria had gone too far. That night I told my brother to keep the record out of the room. Its vibes could infect me, I reasoned.

I have outgrowned those judgements by now. Mostly because as a metal fan I have been exposed to such atrocities it is really hard to be shocked anymore. That said, some stuff still does not appeal to me. Like most gore metal is pretty shitty (no pun intended), not only musically but also visually. I can always appreciate a good monster, blasphemy or an atrocious drawing but I think it’s reality that shocks me the most. Which brings me to the second record that made me feel sick. The name of the band escapes me and I am not about go on the hunt just so that you can witness this shit, but it is from a Finnish metal band and in its cover we can find two Japanese school girls, both of whom seem to have been forcefed shit. It looks real, maybe it is not. But who knows? And who digs that stuff anyway?

Needless to say, you do not have to be sick to enjoy having a quick peek into those perversions. As long as it is just a phase you are ok. Or at least that’s what I like to think. As a bored university student I indulged many afternoons visiting the once free pages of Consumption Junction. The mammoth size website for all things fucked up contained thousands of short videos that range from homemade porn to Taliban executions (Daniel Peart video included), self-mutilation and all kinds of deviant shit. It was there that I once saw a video of two naked Japanese girls puking on each other’s mouths. That proved to be too much. I could simply not take it and had to hit pause almost right away. Immediately after that my youthful fascination with fucked up shit started to fade.

Anyway, I got to I Was Dora Suarez just a couple of weeks ago. I was at work listening to music in my Ipod when a song by Gallon Drunk started playing. It sounded good. It sounded really good. I had never heard of this band and I do not recall downloading their music. I am pretty sure it came onto my hard drive one of those nights in which I mechanically download music I know nothing of. Sometimes I compare this process of downloading illegal music to the process of sleepwalking. I am not entirely aware that I am doing it but I sure as fuck am doing it. Anyway, I recommend Gallon Drunk to anyone who misses The Birthday Party. There is not only a sonic connection but leader James Johnston has been part of The Bad Seeds. After I listened to them at work I Googled them, landed on Wikipedia and found out that their music is inspired by this book.

Check it out here.... (((YO SOY DORA SUAREZ))) 

Things That Look METAL But Are Not

I was at the supermarket last Tuesday when I saw something that looked metal for a second. I was shopping for mortadella cause that's like the cheapest meat around you can slap on bread and I hear that it is bound to cause you cancer with all the fucking nitrites they put on it (I've been on a suicidal kick ever since I heard that Messiah Marcolin no longer sports a frizzy hairdo) when I noticed this pot bellied forty-year something sporting a black t-shirt with a logo that at a distance read like a metal logo. Inverted crosses and all.

I was wearing these old contact lenses that I was supossed to trash like six months ago. Every time I put them on I feel like I am on a cloud or in one of those college dorms usually inhabited my Phish lovers, because everything looks misty, and fuzzy and slightly distorted and I was looking at the guy through the corner of my eyes. For a few seconds I could have sworned that the logo was some satanic concoction designed by some underground artist who only wears black and is hip to black and white black metal artwork and shit.

Anyway, it turns out the logo has nothing to do with metal. It is actually the Guy Harvey logo, which Wikipedia tells me was a dude that loved fish and shit... If you squint your eyes maybe you will see what I saw.

MYSPACE Takes a Leap Off a FUCKING Cliff

I apologize for this rant, but it needs to be said. Perhaps the bigwigs out there will come across this little blog and think for a second. The new MySpace sucks. It sucks. Being a little older, I've seen a lot of changes to things I like. Usually, it can be a good thing, but perhaps just as often it ends up being a total fucking disaster. Enter MySpace.

MySpace, or should I say My______ now (seriously), has been known as a trashy site over the past couple of years, with good reason. Just look at any number of "models" who post animated GIFs of themselves dancing over chairs and humping shit while their page's background involves a series of sparkling cartoon animals. You'll get the idea pretty quick. But that's what I loved about it. The thing about MySpace is it let users do what they wanted. Recently, however, in an effort to appeal to a younger audience and compete with Facebook, they created a new system.

Holy shit does it suck. I've used MySpace for years to check out bands, but fat chance I'm going to do that much anymore since I can do it on Facebook, which is now much, much more user friendly. Whereas bands previously could create their page in their image with whatever pictures and silly things they wanted, now MySpace is forcing users to upgrade to a system where you have limited control. You can create banners and things, but not nearly to the extent that you could previously. Everything you do is run through THEIR editor using a handful of options. Now, this is understandable in a way, because it can help to clean up the clutter people create by clogging the site with thousands of pictures, videos, etc. However, at the same time, it eliminates the freeness that made MySpace so great and fun to come to in the first place. Add to this the insult that the company just announced ALL users will be forced to upgrade by November 29th 2010, and you have a recipe for disaster. I've only mentioned design elements so far, but there are SO many more problems.

First, the site is a fucking cluttered mess. They're removing users' ability to paste shit all over the place, but now MySpace has taken the reins for you, except they're cluttering their site and YOUR page with damn annoying advertisements. Where used to be your music player is now a fucking ad, and the player has been moved down so you have to scroll. There goes ease of use for that aspect. Second, load time has been SIGNIFICANTLY increased. I can't figure out why, but somehow MySpace has managed to make loading time for even the most basic of pages about ten fucking times more than it needs to be. How did you manage this? Wasn't this supposed to save bandwidth? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? Finally (and definitely not the end of it, just search on the internet), I'm sick already of MySpace pretending like this change is a good thing with tons of "articles" claiming that people actually like it. Think so, think these reviews are really honest and not paid for? Just type stuff like "new MySpace sucks" or "new MySpace horrible" into a search engine and take a quick glance. EVEN ON THEIR OWN FUCKING FORUMS YOU'LL FIND THE TRUTH. You people don't listen, you just don't listen. This is probably the end.

EARACHE'S Extreme Stage Diving Application

Extreme Stage Diving is available wordlwide for iPhone and iPod Touch from the App Store at http://j.mp/er3e9r

Grab Earache Extreme Stage Diving now and play along to a killer soundtrack of thrash, death and heavy metal as you throw a pesky stage diver off a festival stage and into the crowd.  Throw the stage diver as far as you can and try to get a high score on the global leaderboards while avoiding objects such as bottles, merch stands and everyone's festival favourite - the portable toilets!

And unlike most apps, Extreme Stage Diving features FULL songs instead of just clips!  And not just one or two, but TEN ripping, full-length tracks!  Play along to:

Evile - Thrasher
At The Gates - Suicide Nation
Bonded By Blood - Prison Planet
White Wizzard - Over the Top
Oceano - District of Misery
The Haunted - The World Burns
Wormrot - Born Stupid
Decapitated - Spheres of Madness
Deicide - Homage For Satan
Brutal Truth - Walking Corpse

Earache Extreme Stage Diving features a fully integrated music player, so you can play along to the tunes you want, when you want.  The game also features a secret, unlockable track which can only be found in this app!

Earache Extreme Stage Diving is an essential app - for metalheads, by metalheads!  Head to the App Store and download it now for free at http://j.mp/er3e9r

PHILIP ANSELMO to Dissect True Crime Films at 2011 SXSW FilmFestival

International best-selling true crime author and MetalSucks contributor Corey Mitchell is proud to announce the esteemed speakers for his “Reel Murder: From Crime Scene to Big Screen” panel for the 2011 SXSW Film Festival, scheduled for March 15, 2011.

Mitchell has gathered together some of the biggest, brightest, and most controversial names in true crime filmmaking including (in alphabetical order):

PHILIP H. ANSELMO – former lead singer of Pantera/frontman for Down. Anselmo is a huge supporter of true crime-based films and composer of the underground cult classic, The Manson Family;

HART D. FISHER – the “most dangerous man in America” and notorious director of the indie serial killer feature, The Garbage Man. Fisher is the publisher of Boneyard Press comics and creator of the infamous Jeffrey Dahmer comic book;

AMI CANAAN MANN – daughter of Manhunt director, Michael Mann, and a rising new director with her upcoming true crime-based film, The Fields, about several unsolved serial killings along I-45 in Texas, featuring Sam Worthington, Chloe Moretz, and Jeffrey Dean Morgan;

JOHN McNAUGHTON – acclaimed director of Mad Dog and Glory and Wild Things. Creator of one of the most revered true crime-based films of all time, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer;

COREY MITCHELL, moderator – Los Angeles Times best-selling true crime author of several books including Pure Murder and Savage Son. Founder of Reel Crime and In Cold Blog, and former Hollywood crime blogger for the Discovery Channel. He also blogs for MetalSucks and
Bloody Disgusting.

WHERE: SXSW 2011 Film Festival
Austin Convention Center
Room TBA
WHEN: Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Time TBA

In this incredible photo we can see Anselmo's soul exiting his body...

METALEPSIA, Self-Titled (Self-Released, 2010)

A couple of weeks ago I received an e-mail from this Argentinian band. They are called Metalepsia. Maybe that's why I actually stopped, read thru the message and proceeded to download their record. Then, I made a post.

Unlike most bands that write me, they weren't asking for a review, they just wanted me to post their album in my spanish blog Discos Inauditos.  Which I did after I checked out their MySpace page and listened to the whole recording once.

The black and white cover artwork says it all. Metalepsia mix and match punk and metal. Which is pretty similar to saying that they play some kind of crossover. They kind of sound like Inepsy and Abigail. Check the dudes on the cover. They are both in shape. They are both obviously into alcohol. One is long-haired and bearded while the other sports a large mohawk. Both share the same symbol in their attire. If you have time, check out the MySpace page for Metalepsia. There we will learn that the scene they dwell in contains equal parts of punkers and metalheads and this is a move this band is backing. There, you will also learn that vocalist  Facundo seems to only own one t-shirt. Venom.

((Metalepsia))

The Lost Art of Record Shopping - MALICE / POST MORTEM / DECEASED

Got off work an hour early on Thursday and headed off the opposite direction of home and to the record store where the man with no smile works. It has been about a month since I saw that shrinkwrapped copy of the Skid Row vinyl but I was quite sure that with the ignorance of all, it would still be there. I was greeted by a sickly blond kid with a Gospel t-shirt. He looked like a Belle and Sebastian fan (so am I but I do not) and he was rocking the skinny jeans to the point of bursting. As I entered I nodded my head. He blinked. I am not sure if that was a salute. I went up straight to the S section and there it was, Skid Row, price? $9.99. Took it in my arms and kept on inspecting.  

I have seen more than a few semi quality hardcore vinyls in this place. A bunch of stuff from Feral Ward. A bunch of stuff I have not heard of and that look-wise does not look half as good as most metal releases. There were a few Profane Existence releases there too. But I did not care. I crave metal. No matter how cheesy, I crave it. If it is old and in spinnable condition, chances are I like it. More chances are that I want it. I like hardcore too, but if I have to pick between the two, there is no contest.

My first find was Malice’s In The Beginning…. (Atlantic, 1985) Me and this band go way back. I was about 12 when I grabbed a hold of this shitty Mexican hard rock magazine that for some accidental reason had landed in South American soil. There was a lot of coverage of Mexican bands I have never heard of. Cristal y Acero. Ramses. Those are the two I remember. I have not heard either but about six months ago I went into YouTube looking for old heavy metal videos and I stumbled upon a Ramses video. It sucked. The music and the video. Both equally.  So I left a comment saying something along the lines of, ‘hahahahahahah, that’s one shitty song.’ A day later, I got a blast of Spanish e-mails mentioning my mother in terms that I did not appreciate.  

I can’t recall the name of the magazine. It was printed in black and white, newspaper quality, and small size. I remember seeing the cover of In The Beginning… in one of those pages. The author spoke highly of this Cali band and even went as far as to compare them to Judas Priest. There is little artwork in the cover so I forgot about them as soon as I turned the page. But I do not forget names, nor logos. Let alone heavy metal names. And when I saw this record last week I knew I had to buy it. Mint condition. Price? $12.99. Ouch! Fuck it.

((In the Beginning...there was shit))

I kept on searching and I didn’t have to look far for my next find.  By the time I got to the letter P I found my next purchase. The Missing Link (New Renaissance, 1987) by Post Mortem. Price? $14.99. Mega ouch! Especially considering that it was a tad beat and that this is a four-song EP. But I did not know that until I got home. Plus, how could I resist a record with a cover like this? I think the boys in Post Mortem used to hate Charlie Benante, that’s why they placed him in the cover, in between a T-Rex and cavemen, as if his ilk, his breed, his kind, the metalhead, was just that, the missing link between zero-neuron beings and the modern times. That has got to be Benante. Big belly. Wiry puffy hair. Slayer t-shirt. Hands in pocket. Looks like a dumbass.

((The Missing Link is Charlie Benante))

By then, it was about time to get home and I knew I wasn’t going to have enough time to go through every single letter in the alphabet. I took a look around me, a quick peek to all the vinyl racks and to the records positioned up front and there it was, a Deceased record. As the Weird Travel On (Thrash Corner, 2005) to be more precise. How could anyone miss it? The covers that  embellish this band’s releases are a work of art. Tasty delicatessen stuff for metalheads. Price? $15.99. Who said that shopping vinyl was a cheap pleasure? No one that’s right. And at four, that was three more than what I was planning on buying so I had no option but to return the Skid Row record to the rack. I can always come back next month. I am pretty sure it will still be there. 

It may be a policy of this store to be a dick or to be as articulate as a mannequin, but the sickly Gospel-loving blond kid did not utter a word when I bought these records. He didn’t say 'hi', or 'bye', or ‘the total is $45’. I had to look at the register to know the final price and handed my card. Then, I walked out quietly...

New PENTAGRAM Album Coming in April

MetalSucks contributor Leyla Ford recently spoke with PENTAGRAM frontman Bobby Liebling. Liebling shared some news about the band's forthcoming album, as well as what he's been up to nowadays:

ON THE NEW ALBUM:
You’re off to record the Last Rites album soon, I believe?
I leave Wednesday morning and we start recording the album this coming Sunday night [November 21].

I’m sure you’re pretty excited about it. Can you tell me a bit about the new record?
Actually, the songs on Last Rites are predominantly, I’d say two-thirds [of them are] songs I wrote in 1970, and if you’re familiar with any Pentagram stuff at all… you know each album is usually a sixty-forty split. Sixty percent is stuff that I did in the early ‘70s, and forty percent is collaborations and new stuff. The upcoming album is slated to have thirteen songs, but we don’t know if we’re going to be able to record all of them. We’re going to try to get it all in. It’s going to be a shorter album, but it’ll be part of a double-disc set with an hour-long live DVD from last year’s Maryland Deathfest.

Is there a definite release date for it?
No, not a definite date, but it’s scheduled to be released in early April. I was told by my superiors [laughs], as it were, that I shouldn’t talk about the record label, but I will say that we’ve got a multi-album deal and it’s with a significant, well, let’s say the largest label I’ve ever been on. 

That’s great, congratulations!
Thank you, it’s been long enough coming. 2011 marks Pentagram’s fortieth anniversary.

Wow, that’s a good, long run. Hopefully with many more years to come.
We’ll see! That’s why I’m calling it Last Rites, just in case! But there are four songs that are brand-new, and the other nine consist of several I wrote on my own, and a few I wrote with my original drummer, Geof O’Keefe. Those are the ones scheduled to be on there. But one of the old ones might go, as well as a new one. We’re doing a cram course, you might call it. All the other Pentagram albums that have been done were recorded over a three-month period. This album is going to be done in three weeks. We’re rehearsing it five days, that’s it, and these songs have never been played by anyone in the band [currently].
 
ON HIS LIFE THESE DAYS:

My life has changed in a great deal of ways. I met my wife, and the last three years I’ve had a very, very different life. I’ve been clean for the first time after forty years of drug addiction — that’s a long, long time. Now I have a baby, and a house, and a dog, and a picket fence and backyard and all that stuff! Being straight is a really new awakening for me, and it’s really fantastic. And some people might think it’s corny, but I just tribute it to the guy upstairs nowadays. Pentagram was never a “Satan” band like people think it was, it was always just giving you the layout, like the album says, of your choices, because you have to make a choice, and there are two ways you can go. The songs were sort of like warning,s and people mistook those for us being black metal and all that kind of stuff. Then came the eras of the death metal and black metal bands, a lot of them were influenced [by us] supposedly, and they tell me on tours and stuff, but, you know…